Zoning In On Easter [We Who Once Were Far Away Have Been Brought Near...]

Hello friends!  Happy Easter weekend to y'all!

I have to admit, this year I have not been as focused on "Holy Week," these days leading up to Easter, as I normally am.  My mind has been preoccupied with other things.  

But I'm taking this writing course online (I'll tell you more about it soon), and I had a writing assignment to do today... and this is what came out.  I think my heart just needed to zone in on Easter... on the victory that was accomplished for us on the cross. 

It's brief... but I wanted to share this with you all today.  May it bless you.... and may the full revelation of the finished work of the cross and the freedom that was won for us make your heart burn inside of you this Easter.

Easter.  It comes around every year.  The calendar, and hopefully the weather, say “springtime!” ...and Easter arrives, hand-in-hand with warmer temperatures and tulips popping their heads through the soil in my flower beds.  

It comes with such regularity that sometimes, I forget to notice it.  To pause.  To ponder. 

And today…Saturday… is a day for pondering.  Friday, Jesus died.  Sunday, He arose victorious.

But Saturday?  Saturday, death had conquered. Or so it seemed. The Lord of the universe was in the tomb, sealed by a giant stone and guarded by soldiers. 

Those who loved Him were devastated.  Those who’d killed him?  Pretty sure they were squirming on the inside over what they’d done: “Surely this man was the Son of God.”  (Mark 15:39)

The disciples huddled together, shoulders shaking with grief, hearts shattered, hopes dashed and dreams crushed.

They’d forgotten what He’d said.  Or simply not understood.  “Destroy this temple and I will raise it again in 3 days.”

Darkness seemed to have won.  The sting of death hung thick in the air… thick in the hearts.

All the world waited.

The hours ticked by. 

Night... and tears... fell.

And then… then, came a Sunday morning sunrise like none other, before or since.  A sunrise accompanied by the trembling of the earth as the Son of God rose, life restored, divine power pulsing, surging through His glorified body.

And those women, trudging to the tomb that morning, hearts and feet heavy with sorrow?  NOTHING could have prepared them to hear one of the most victory-infused, power-laden declarations ever spoken: 

“Why are you looking among the dead for someone who is alive?  He isn’t here! He is risen from the dead!”

He is RISEN! 

We say it every Easter – “He is risen.”  And the response: “He is risen indeed.”

But do we really consider the implications of that first Easter morning, its practical impact on our lives? 

Death is swallowed up in victory, and we who once were far away have been brought near!! NEAR!!  Near to the heart of God, near to the throne of grace, invited into intimate friendship with the Holy One!  

All because He is risen.  Because the power of sin and death over us has been SHATTERED. Because by His death and resurrection, Jesus CRUSHED the head of our enemy.

Because He loves us.  Because we were the joy set before Him, His motivation to endure the cross.  Your heart… and mine.

He is risen… and we have been brought near… and set wildly free... and brought to life on the inside.

And I am so… beyond… thankful.

Part 2: The Wreck and the Aftermath

Today I went over to the dealership where we left my minivan with its possibly-going-flat front left tire.  I photographed the damage... $4,350 worth, as I mentioned in Part 1 of this story.

Front driver's side wheel - where we got shoved into the curb.

...and took a few pics at the scene of the accident:

Leftover debris on the side of the road - this was from the front of the car that hit us.

The curb on the wrong side of the road we had been turning onto
with marks from our impact.

Where we were when we got hit - just about to turn right here.  Those are the trees where we would have ended up if I hadn't found the stinkin' brake pedal.... We ended up over there next to them facing the wrong way on the left side of that road.  For anyone familiar with Greensboro, this is at Eagle Road and (almost) Bridford Parkway... over off of West Wendover.

One final pic: this is the dealership where I had been headed to get an oil change... in the parking lot of which sits my crippled minivan, awaiting the insurance adjuster.  This is a Hendrick dealership - there are hundreds of them around the country.  The fact that we bought our minivan from  a Hendrick-owned Nissan dealership in Kansas City last year meant a rolled-out red carpet for us at this Hendrick-owned Chevy dealership here in Greensboro.  Super thankful - these guys are great and incredibly helpful.
(Note the Carolina Blue sky... Nowhere like here.)
~~~

Today we have felt okay.  Isaac is acting normal - pretty sure he's fine.  We had a BLAST at the Greensboro children's museum today and I might not be able to resist posting pictures from our visit there at some point in the near future.

Jerusha and I have been a bit sore today.  Interesting fact: We hadn't been certain, though Jerusha was fairly sure she remembered correctly, that we had in fact turned and looked at each other briefly in shock when the initial impact occurred.  Today, the left side of my neck is sore (I would have turned to my right to look at her) and the right side of her neck is sore (she would have obviously turned her head left to look at me).  We laughed today about the location of our muscle soreness being proof of the fact that we did indeed make some kind of momentary stunned, terrified eye contact with each other before it occurred to me to put my foot on the brake. :)

A cool thing that happened that I don't want to forget:

When my dad and I finally got home from leaving my van at the dealership after the accident, it was time for Isaac to go down for his nap.  I changed his diaper and got him all snuggled up under his blankets... and then lay down next to him.  I wanted to give him a chance to process what had happened.  

Our conversation went something like this:

Mommy: "Isaac, remember when we were driving in our car and then BANG, that car crashed into our car?  And then we stopped really fast and you were crying?  That was scary, huh?"

Isaac: "Bang!  Crash!  Our car was breaking!  Really broken!"  He whimpered and snuggled closer to me.

Mommy: "I know buddy, that was scary... That car crashed into our car and our car IS broken... but Jesus kept us safe, Isaac!  Jesus kept Isaac safe, and Mommy safe, and Jerusha safe!  And the mechanics will fix our car so it will be all better."  (He's been learning about mechanics lately - he's fascinated by them.)

Isaac: "Crash!  Jesus kept safe!  Mechanics!  Tow trucks!"  No longer whimpering.

Mommy: "Yep, we're all safe, bud.  Isaac and Mommy and Jerusha - Jesus kept us all safe!  We can pray and tell Him thank you.... Thank you Jesus for keeping us safe!"

Isaac: "Isaac safe.  Thank You Jesus keeping us safe!"

I finished tucking him in and he rolled over...fell asleep in complete peace.  I loved it.  I loved that he got to process the emotions around the wreck with me.  I had been concerned for him because he'd been "whisked away" to go back to Gigi and Grandpa's house so quickly after it had happened and I hadn't had the opportunity to help him process.... but then I was so thankful that a couple of hours later he was able to talk with me about it, to remember it and feel it with his emotions and then to realize that Jesus took care of us and thank Him for that.  

What an incredible gift and responsibility God has given us as parents, eh?  This charge to shepherd and steward and guard our kiddos' hearts before Him?  There is nothing more challenging... or more fulfilling or exhilarating. 

To all of you who've prayed for us in the wake of the crash, thank you.  I've had a few moments of fear as I've been riding and/or driving in the last 24 hours, as this was by far the most intense wreck I've ever experienced.... but Jesus is faithful and His grace is more than enough.  Still, it's kind of hard not to be sitting at a stop sign or traffic light and be bracing myself to be hit again.  Interesting.  I didn't expect to experience this.  I'm sure it'll pass.

In the meantime... I'm meeting tomorrow morning with the insurance adjuster who will be checking out the damage to my car.  Praying that AllState quickly accepts liability for the accident and QUICKLY releases me to begin having repairs done...so that we can MAYBE get back to KC by the end of this week.  (The original plan was to leave NC this coming Thursday morning.  That is looking unlikely.)

We'll see.   All's well.  We're just thankful over here.

:)

Part 1: How Getting A North Carolina Oil Change Turned... Well... Interesting.

Isaac passionately loves to crash his cars, trucks, airplanes, helicopters... whatever... into each other.  Or into walls or tables or floors or any other hard surface you can imagine.

This morning (Monday, 3/18) he experienced his first real crash.

Let me say it now: we are all okay.

Isaac and I, along with our housemate Jerusha, are in North Carolina visiting my family.  Stan wasn't able to come because of his work schedule (sad!!) so Jerusha agreed to take some time off of work and wrangle this 17-and-a-half hour road trip with Isaac and me.  Yup, that's us.  The road trip wranglers.  We drove from Kansas City straight through to NC.  No, we won't be driving it straight on the way back.  Just for the record.  HOLY COW it was long.

The (grubby) Road Trip Wranglers: Cheesin' it up outside 
Cracker Barrel in Frankfort, KY.

So somewhere in the middle of Kentucky or West Virginia, my "oil change" light came on. Yes, I feel kinda dumb for not getting an oil change before we left town... but we decided to press on through and get the oil changed here in Greensboro.  So... this morning I was finally on my way to do that.  Isaac and Jerusha were in the car with me.

It was overcast and sprinkling outside.  We drove not even 5 minutes up the road from my parents' house and prepared to turn right to go toward the parking lot of the dealership... and....

SLAM!!!!!!!!!!!

The crash was deafening.  We were hit from behind and everything that happened next occurred in slow motion. 

I gasped, stunned.  I remember Jerusha crying out in shock. Jerusha says she remembers us looking wide-eyed at each other for a split second as our car careened forward, out of control.  Both of our heads snapped forward and a quick moment of severe pain shot through them, then subsided completely.  

My right foot moved in slow motion, searching.  I have to find the brake pedal or we'll end up in those trees... Have to stop the car...........

Finally found it and pressed down as hard and fast as I ever have.  We came to a quick stop, slamming hard into the curb on the wrong side of the road we'd been in the process of turning onto.  I remember being so thankful we hadn't jumped the curb and ended up in the trees.

The entire event happened within probably 3 seconds.  They were the longest 3 seconds of my life.

"Thank you Jesus that we're okay."  I think I said it out loud.

Isaac was screaming, crying, shocked and terrified.

I stumbled out of the car, opened his door, unbuckled him from his car seat with shaky hands.  Never have I been more profoundly thankful for a car seat.  Ever.

I pulled him out of the car and held and comforted him and he began to calm down.

I hope his little spine is okay....

The guy who hit me came over, asked if we were alright, told us he'd tried to stop but lost traction on the wet road.  I asked Jerusha to call 911 and let them know we needed a cop.  I called my parents, who arrived within 5 minutes.  We loaded Isaac's car seat into their car, and they took Isaac and Jerusha back to their house while I waited on the officer to fill out his crash report.

Nearly two hours later, my dad (who'd dropped the others off at home and then come back to meet me) and I arrived back at my parents' place.  Minus my un-driveable 2012 minivan. :( It's a little sad - I'm not gonna lie.  

Got an estimate from the body shop at the dealership where I had been planning to get an oil change:  $4,350 worth of damage.  

Entire rear body/underneath needs replaced.  Front driver's side tire/wheel/rim/possible suspension/steering damage... from slamming into the curb.

I am so thankful it wasn't my fault.  And that the other guy's insurance policy is legit so we won't have to pay a penny.  And again, that we're all okay.  

Years ago I lost traction on wet roads and rear-ended someone - so I felt bad for him.  And he was apologetic.  A good guy.  Just a bummer.

Definitely wondering if we'll wake up with sore necks/backs tomorrow from the insane whiplash moment we experienced.  Really praying Isaac's okay.  He seems to be - he's his normal wild, fun, dancing self. :)

We have to wait until Wednesday morning for the other guy's insurance adjuster to come out and do their whole estimate thing....for AllState to accept liability for the accident and approve getting the damage fixed.  7 days worth of repairs need to be made on my car, according to the guy at the body shop.  IF we end up needing to get all the work done in North Carolina, that puts us arriving back home in KC probably a full WEEK later than we'd planned.  Eesh.  And that wouldn't be such a big deal except for the fact that my little guy is SERIOUSLY missing his daddy. :(  As am I!  

There's a chance we'll be able to only get my front left tire/wheel situation fixed here and then drive it back to KC and have the rest of the work done there.  Hoping and praying that that works out.

All of that said, I don't know that I have anything super profound to say tonight, except just that, despite all the inconvenience and hassle of this whole ordeal, I see the hand of God woven through all of it.  He's good and faithful, and He protects and provides and gives grace for every moment, every circumstance.

Stay tuned for Part 2 of the story within the next couple of days.

:)

My First 5-Minute Friday: "STAY"

So, Lisa-Jo Baker, the community manager for (in)Courage, hosts these "5-Minute Fridays" over at her blog.  This happens every single Friday and I've contemplated starting to participate in these for quite a while.  I've been a little busy and distracted lately and my writing has kind of fallen by the side and I really don't want it to, because it is so life-giving to me...and hopefully to a few others.

I find that when I write I am more in tune with what God's doing in my heart and how He's speaking to me in the midst of my circumstances and just my daily life.... and I find that I'm more able to articulate those things in spoken conversation as well...which I have really struggled with off and on.

And so... in an effort to give myself at least SOME "heart-regularity" (which is [not so] different than the type of regularity that's the opposite of constipation), I want to try joining up with the gals over at Lisa-Jo's site for a while.  

The rules are simple: Take the one-word prompt for the day, and write on it, whatever comes to mind, for 5 minutes.  No major editing, little to no analyzing... just write.

So... here's what happened when I did this today:

Stay...

The prompt is "stay" and the first thing that comes to mind is the many moments I've spent rocking my son before bed.  I remember in his baby-hood, how I'd sit and try to come up with a song for him about staying here on my shoulder just a little longer before growing up.  No song ever came together really, but that longing of my heart has never subsided.  When I'm really living IN the moment, being present to him and present IN this season of my life, this word is so profound to me.  "Stay here on my lap just another minute, buddy." Reminding me to stay here and build this ridiculous tower with him one more time, so he can knock it down one more time, so I can hear his laugh one more time...to stay here a little longer, cuddling on the couch with my family, watching the Sound of Music.  So... I pray that I do.  I pray that I grab hold of each of these moments and stay present... stay in tune... stay engaged... just STAY.  I pray that I stay.  God, let me "stay" well.

Colorado Beauty: Nature and JESUS and Precious Friends

My dear friends!

I just returned home a couple of days ago from the place that captured my heart years ago and will forever hold a piece of me... Colorado.  This past weekend the precious ladies of the Littleton Vineyard Church had a women's retreat up in Allenspark, CO (near Estes)... and they invited me out to lead worship for them for the weekend.  Can I just say that I was SO, SO blessed to be a part of it?  Because I was.  Profoundly.

The drive up was snowy (though the roads were clear) and absolutely gorgeous.  The retreat center was fabulous....and the views were stunning.  But even more stunning were the sweetness of community among the ladies, and the sweetness of the tangible presence of Jesus... His commitment to tenderly encounter and bring healing to the hearts of each woman there.

I loved every raw, beautiful, healing minute.

(Thanks to Nicole and Jordan for several of these pics!)

The retreat weekend was sandwiched with sweet moments with dear friends.  Gotta love these Brits.  We miss them so.

Coach Ian teaches Isaac some soccer skillz.

Sue and Dana are LOOOOOPY after the retreat.

And tired.  But happy.

Blessings to you today, friends.  Juicy Jesus/heart stuff to come in the next couple of days... :)

Guest Posting Over At (In)Courage Today! (God's Invitation In the Midst Of the Storm)

Hi My Dear Friends,

When I wrote this post a couple of months ago, I was deeply feeling the pain of a particular loss, the details of which I'm not really at liberty to share here in this space.  Suffice it to say, I was grieving fairly intensely.  Since this post was written, the ache of this loss has ebbed and flowed and I've mostly not felt the grief as deeply.

Ironically though, today as my post goes live over at (In)Courage, I am again in a season where the pain around this loss is at the surface. The ache feels like an elephant sitting on my chest.  And I'm finding that the timing of the Lord in this post being published today is no coincidence... it is fresh truth and life to me all over again today.

Praying you are blessed as you read, that God encounters you through it in whatever way your heart is in need of Him today.

God's Invitation In the Midst Of the Storm

Dear Friends,

I find myself lately in one of “those” seasons.  You know…when your heart is heavy over circumstances beyond your control… Maybe a relationship is failing; maybe your job is ending; maybe your child is not walking with the Lord….  And to be honest, it feels a little strange to be writing in order to encourage, while my own heart feels this grief so deeply.  

Yet, deeper than the aching, this truth echoes loud:  That when we do share, real, raw, and honest in the midst of all the messiness of life and relationships and hearts… the Father comes then and fills our hurting places… these chasms in our hearts… with His glory, His strength that’s perfected in our weakness… and His beauty pours forth out of pain.

And so… even with this heaviness of heart that feels so real and so acute lately, I want to share with you these things that I know…these truths that I hold onto, which are even MORE REAL than my earthly reality.....

To finish reading, click here ~~ hop over and join me at (In)Courage where I have the honor of guest posting today!

Splashes of Beauty: Fall Beauty in the Hood, Sky Safari, a Mommy/IsaacPhoto Shoot, and More

Life in the hood has been a little intense lately.

If you're new-ish around here, you may or may not have discovered yet that my family and I live in "the hood."  A.K.A. inner city Kansas City, MO.  A.K.A. the Historic Northeast Neighborhood.

Seems like there's been a little more crime than usual lately.  Definitely a lot more praying going on among those of us who love Jesus and live around here... praying for God to bring His Kingdom... to bring peace... to reveal Himself to these people who need Him so desperately.

And yet in the midst of all of the intensity of this precious neighborhood... there is beauty here.  And God continually makes us aware of His nearness here.... Here, where everything seems dark, and hope is hard to make out against the backdrop of crime and poverty and oppression.  But hope is here.  

Hope is here in our 16 year old neighbor boy who out of nowhere asked us to pray for his family last week... and then allowed us to pray with him right there in his driveway... and then shook our hands and thanked us sincerely, totally dropping his guard and his need to be "cool."

Hope is present here in a million other ways too... if we're just willing to keep our eyes open.

All of this beauty, glimpses of hope against this backdrop of hopelessness and fear.  They speak of who He is and the way He loves. 

And of His presence... even here.  

We just have to keep our eyes open a little wider for Him.

Question to ponder:  Where does God fling "splashes of beauty" into your life? How does He display His splendor and whisper His nearness even in the midst of dark or difficult moments or seasons?

Here are a few more splashes of beauty from my life this week.  I've been acutely aware lately of His whispers to slow down and notice Him, all around me... His pursuit of my heart, evidenced by these good and perfect gifts.

Okay... um... I know I said good and perfect gitfs. Who knew
hippo bottoms could fall into that category?! But this was
actually a really cool moment.  You see, we were at the zoo
in the late afternoon and we're usually never there at that
time of day, so we rarely see the hippos move out of the water. So
this was a maybe once or twice a year experience for us!
So yes... I felt loved by the Lord in this moment. :)  God cares
about the little things, like the fact that my son passionately
loves the hippos, right?!  DEFINITELY.

At the KC Zoo they have this "Sky Safari" thing that takes you over the
Africa portion of the zoo.  It's a really fun view.  Isaac and I had never
ridden it before, but it's only 2 bucks each way for both of us to ride, so
I decided to go for it this time.  It was so beyond worth the $4!
Taking pics was difficult with me trying to keep one arm tight around
him... but I managed to get a few. Isaac loved being "way up high!"

This one was taken on the train at the zoo.  Isaac absolutely ADORES the
train. It goes through tunnels (his FAVE!!) and everything!

Like I said... trains and tunnels... There is nothing in the
world more amazing to him. 

A good friend had his birthday party at a bowling alley and it was Isaac's
first time bowling.  Annnnnnd.... he got a STRIKE on his FIRST bowl!!!
Okay, so I helped him a little. It was cool though. :)

FINALLY... (If you're still reading, please pardon all the pictures!  Definitely have a ton this week!) I'll leave you with this set of pics from a random Mommy/Isaac photo shoot from one day this week.  We were just having fun goofing off with my iPhone camera.... and this was what happened.  (This is the real me.  Yup.  And the real Isaac.  In all of our weirdness glory.)

Whew!  There ya have it!  All of our goofiness right here, just for you.  If you're still here, thanks for caring about our life!  

God is so good to us in the midst of all of these mundane and messy and beautiful moments...even in the moments when the waiting for promises to be fulfilled feels endless.  He is here.  He is faithful.  He is extravagant.  He is WORTH IT ALL.

Your love, Lord, reaches to the heavens,
    your faithfulness to the skies.
 Your righteousness is like the highest mountains,
    your justice like the great deep.
    You, Lord, preserve both people and animals.
 How priceless is your unfailing love, O God!
    People take refuge in the shadow of your wings.
 They feast on the abundance of your house;
    you give them drink from your river of delights.
 For with you is the fountain of life;
    in your light we see light.

~Psalm 36:5-9

Be blessed today, my sweet friends, to have open eyes to see and discern the Father's extravagant heart toward you, all around you.  And may your worship flow out of that place this morning.