Thursday, August 23, 2012

For The Days We Feel So Inadequate (Like We'll Never Be Enough...)

"Wife-hood" (have I mentioned that I like to make up new words?), motherhood, and ministry.... and just life in general.... they all have this way of making you constantly question whether you're enough.  Strong enough, gentle enough, loving enough, firm enough, consistent enough, in-tune enough with people's needs, giving enough, spending enough time with the Lord.....  

Who defines "enough," really?

Is "enough" even quantifiable?

And when it all comes down, isn't it more about HIS "enough-ness" than mine anyway?

These moments of failure, of raising my voice at my son in anger... of forgetting to trust Stan's leadership as my husband, forgetting to trust his heart toward me.... of neglecting to follow through on a commitment I made to a precious friend in our house church....of not feeling like I know our neighbors well enough... Sometimes this blaring inadequacy makes me feel like burying my head in the sand and not coming out for a few months.  Know the feeling??

AND THEN..... this whispering knock at my heart: "You'll NEVER be enough, Dana."  The voice of the enemy?  NO.  The loving whisper of the Father: "You'll never be enough... It's true... It's not your job to be."

Deep sigh.... Oh yes, Lord.... How quickly I forget....

....How quickly I forget about how He fills in my gaps... how His strength is made perfect in my weakness.... how I can relax and just lean, and He moves mountains.... how His invitation is to open up my weaknesses and inadequacies to Him so they can be filled, like a canyon is carved by water that runs through it.... how His rivers of mercy carve this raw beauty into my heart when I let go of control, of striving to be enough.... how my inadequacy can become a channel for Grace....His Grace that carves deeper still, making room for more....and how it spills out all around me - His manifest glory all over these places where I'm not enough.  

Oh Father.... how are You so beautiful and so good!?!?  

I am just wrecked by this mercy that grabs hold of my heart and births beauty in all of my gaps.

And in the midst of His glory being revealed all over my inadequate, beautiful mess, He reminds me, "There is no space between a river and the rock that it carves...."  Yes Lord.... No space between Your heart and mine... A reminder that all of this is simultaneously about His glory AND about His pursuit of intimate friendship with me, deeper trust, more leaning into Him....which brings Him more glory anyway....

This line from Ann Voskamp's blog echos in my mind today, in light of all of this, and I just have to share it with you:

"When you’re in covenant with Christ, it’s His responsibility to cover your cracks, to be all your competency and completeness." - - from Ann Voskamp's blog, A Holy Experience.

Be blessed today friends, in the midst of your inadequacy, to see Him more and more....

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Would you share a piece of your heart, your journey, with us today?

* What circumstances tend to make you more aware of your inadequacy? 
*What does it look like for you to lean into Him in the midst of your weakness?
*How do you feel like He wants to reveal His glory through it all?


  1. "You'll never be enough... It's true... It's not your job to be." Wow I do love this insight. So easy to forget this perspective. I've been bloggin g about a related phenomena today myself--never living up to expectations, not mine, not God's, not others... drop by when you have a few minutes... --Linda

    1. Hi Linda, I checked out your blog.... Really like what you're saying in that post.... especially..."....always wanting the directions to be clear so she can follow them to the "T" and so gain approval and significance in the world - be justified by keeping the rules." Awesome, awesome insight... Raw and real and convicting. Thank you! And thanks so much for stopping by here and leaving a comment. Bless you today....

  2. This was spot and much needed encouragement.
    The lord bless you ;0)

    1. Hi Lee,

      Welcome! Thanks so much for reading and commenting. Super encouraging to me. Love having you here. :)

      The Lord bless YOU today, too!


    2. Dana,
      Saw your reply on Ann's incourage post of yesterday, and came over to read your post. Your post brought to mind a poem I've loved for years, by Sir Thomas Browne, that I think fits well with what you were saying. When I'm so focused on my inadequacies, I'm really not letting Him fill me; and yet that's what I really need and truly want ~ for Him to fill me with Himself.
      In His grace, Kay

      If thou could'st empty all thyself of self,
      Like to a shell dishabited,
      Then might He find thee on the ocean shelf,
      And say, 'This is not dead',
      And fill thee with Himself instead.

      But thou art all replete with very thou
      And hast such shrewd activity,
      That when He comes, He says, 'This is enow
      Unto itself - 'twere better let it be,
      It is so small and full, there is no room for me.'

      Sir Thomas Browne

    3. Hi Kay! WOW! I love that poem! So profound and TRUE. Thanks so much for coming over, reading, and for sharing this with me. Be blessed and FILLED today. Hope to "see" you back here again sometime soon. :)


  3. Hello Dana,
    I just came from Ann Voscamps site and after I read your comment on fear of not doing good enough and then I saw your blog address I was curious to check it out. I am so blessed with what God showed you in not being enough and Him filling in the cracks! It was so good I plan to send some of it to my very close friend that I was talking with just this night on the very subject. I love learning new things from new people. It makes me realize what a big (heavenly) family I really have as we all share the same Father!!! Paul mentioned that we are members of one body and with reading what God has given you makes me realize I just discovered my hand that I can now scratch that itch. :)

    Be blessed!

    Because of Him, ~Jessica

    1. Hi Jessica! So glad you found your way here! :) And even more glad that God blessed you through this post. He is so sweet to give us exactly what He knows we need, WHEN we need it. Hope your friend is encouraged by it too. We DO have a big family under our BIG Father... I love that. Love having you here! Thanks so much for your encouragement! :) You be blessed too!

  4. I shared this post as's definitely one of my biggest struggles!

    1. Aprille... thank you for sharing this... and for being here. :)


Hi there, friend! I'm honored and blessed when you share your heart, your thoughts, your feedback with me here. At the same time, I want my readers to feel free to read and process internally before the Lord... to not feel obligated to spit out immediate feedback.... so I am SO not upset or offended by non-commenting readers. Please be who you are - - internal AND external processors welcome here! :)

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