Before Motherhood: 6 Things I Wish I'd Been Told

Happy Mothers' Day in advance to all you mom-friends!

This post is part of a Mothers' Day series (over at the blog of a new friend) called Thanks to Motherhood.  

Upon considering motherhood, all its ups and downs and the ways that God continually encounters and shapes my heart through it all, I wrote this list of 6 things I wish I'd known as I stepped into motherhood.

So, all of you, whether you're already a mama, or waiting to be one, or not even sure if you ever want to be one, this is for you.

I wish I had known...

1. That motherhood would bring me to the absolute end of myself. That sleepless nights and exhausting days and seemingly insurmountable obstacles would stretch me beyond the outermost rim of myself, of my capabilities, of my coping skills. And that that’s okay.

2. That motherhood would be the most fulfilling task I’d ever attempt – but only if I embraced each moment of it with a wide open heart. Only if I dove into RIGHT NOW, head first. Only if I chose to be present to my children, to my life, instead of wishing I was somewhere else, doing something else. That living present and engaged was what would make motherhood absolutely. awesome.

~~~

Today my writing is being hosted by Sarah, over at Girl Grows Up. You are hereby invited to click on over to Sarah's place to read the other 4 things I wish I'd been told before becoming a mom. :)

Blessings, my friends!

PS. Be thou not confused - I am still "unplugged" over here! :) I wrote this post in advance and have just stopped over here today to activate the link to Girl Grows Up.  See y'all in 2 weeks!

How Interruptions Aren't Really Interruptions

Pile of blankets on the floor next to my son's bed.  Leftover evidence of the nights we've spent sleeping there (me one night, my hubby the next).  Or trying to sleep.  Feverish, croupy, coughing kiddo makes for a looonnnnng night.

Messy house.  Pillows strewn all around.  Toys that've migrated out of the playroom and been abandoned in various and sundry locations.  Blanket here.  Kleenex box there.  Empty apple sauce pouch that didn't make it to the trash.  Dish mountain in the sink, waiting to be tackled.  Extra hours of Curious George on the playroom TV. 

Such is life in the Butler household with a sick lil' guy.

We stayed home from church yesterday morning.  Dearly missed worshiping with our church family.  But honestly, something in me willingly settled down into just laying low with my family.  I enjoyed it.


If I'd Choose to Stop Feeling Interrupted
And then there was this quote that somehow ended up in my inbox yesterday morning (of all mornings), from this post over at The Better Mom.  The timing was hilariously perfect.

“The great thing, if one can, is to stop regarding all the unpleasant things as interruptions of one’s ‘own,’ or ‘real’ life. The truth is of course that what one calls the interruptions are precisely one’s real life — the life God is sending one day by day.”
~C.S. Lewis

Hello?!  Did someone install spy-cams in my house to observe my life so they'd know EXACTLY what post to send me THIS morning?  I think I laughed out loud at how this post met me precisely in the midst of my exact circumstances.

When sickness invades our home and puts our "normal" lives on pause, it can feel like the greatest of interruptions.

Before that post hit my inbox, sometime in the middle of the night while I was rocking my sicky boy, my heart began to shift.  I went from hating the fact that I was awake and feeling sorry for myself because I'd only slept maybe a 10 minute stretch all night long, to thanking God.

Thanking Him for this opportunity to cuddle with my little guy.  Acknowledging that he won't be little much longer, that before I know it, he'll be too big to sit on my lap and let me rock him.

We hear these things often as moms of littles - from ladies in the grocery store, from our friends whose kids are older.  "Cherish every moment.  They grow up so fast."

Maybe we roll our eyes.  If not our physical eyes, then maybe we roll the eyes of our heart?  Is such a thing possible?

But it really is true.  They DO grow up quickly.  And God offers us grace to cherish these moments, the here and now, when we turn our hearts toward Him in the midst of them.  These "interruptions" of our "real" life that are REALLY our LIFE. 

And there's LIFE to be found in them.

There's LIFE in the extra cuddles and kisses that come with a sick little one.  There's LIFE in the laying down of my own life to serve my family.  There's LIFE in the sleepless nights when I turn my heart toward the Father, acknowledging that He sees my giving tylenol and stroking hair and propping up and adjusting covers for the 12th time, and all my rocking, rocking, rocking.

He sees all this laying down of my life, and receives it all as worship.  A pleasing fragrance to His heart.

There's LIFE to be found when I choose to stop feeling interrupted and wholeheartedly embrace this moment, the one I've been given.  

When I jump into RIGHT NOW with both feet, my heart anticipating divine encounter.

God's waiting in the right now, wanting to reveal Himself, to offer grace for the "interruptions" that make up our real life.  

Grace to stop feeling interrupted and be fully present - to God, and to our lives.

Jump in with me today?

~~~

P.S. - My first monthly e-newsletter will come out later this week, straight to your inbox if you're subscribed.  I'm so excited to share this with you!   In the newsletter I'll be able to share a little more intimately than I can on a public blog.  If you're not subscribed to receive it and you'd like to, you can go here to subscribe. (Only takes a few seconds.)

***When you subscribe to the newsletter, you'll also have the option to download my FREE e-book, Stillness Manifesto: A Call to NON-Action (Complete with NON-Instructions).  I just launched this book a week ago and it's getting some fun feedback.  Interested?  Click here to see what others are saying about Stillness Manifesto.***

PPS.  Want to click over to the blog?  It's right here.

8 Creative Ways To Increase Your Awareness of God's Nearness in the Day-to-Day

Hi friends!

The turning of your heart toward the Father in the midst of your day-in, day-out routines and circumstances absolutely delights His heart.  Focusing on His nearness can also dramatically alter our days: they are transformed from feeling mundane, to being filled with anticipation of divine encounter.  

God is always pursuing our hearts. In every single moment and every single circumstance of our lives.

Here are some creative, practical suggestions of how to increase your awareness of God's nearness and His pursuit of your heart in the midst of the plain ol' NORMALness of life.

1. Start out by leaning in.  Before your feet hit the floor every morning, pull your heart-priorities into order.  Confess your dependence on Him for every breath and every moment.  Trust Him to strengthen you and encounter you throughout your day.  Choose, in those first few moments of your day, to tune your heart in to His nearness and His tender pursuit of your heart.

2. Worship, worship, worship.  Playing worship music (hello, Pandora.com!) and singing from my heart to the Lord helps cut through a cranky atmosphere in our home, especially in the mornings when my son and his... ahem... mommy are often whiny and out of sorts.  Worship really does - it helps change the atmosphere.  The atmosphere of our homes, and the atmosphere of our hearts.  Declaring and agreeing with the truth of who God is aligns our hearts underneath that truth.  It changes our perspective and the way we experience the events of our day. (Important thought: If worship music is becoming just background noise, it often helps if I turn it off for a while and use other methods to stay aware of God's presence and voice.)

3. Meditate on Scripture.  Write it on sticky notes, note cards, etc.  Play recordings of it.  Choose verses in which the Lord highlights aspects of His heart toward you or His presence with you, and post them around your house.  Memorize and meditate on them.  Contemplate His heart as He reveals it to you through His Word.  (Verses I love:  Zephaniah 3:17, Psalm 42:8, Psalm 40:1, Deut. 31:6, Phil. 4:13, Matt. 11:28-30, Psalm 18, Psalm 139.)  I'd love to hear your suggestions of other verses in which you've encountered God's heart toward you in the comments.

4. Pray quick prayers to refocus your heart on His nearness.  Again, post sticky notes around your kitchen or office or wherever you spend the most time.  Write quick, one-sentence prayers on them that you can pray in 10 seconds or less, in the midst of whatever else you have going on, that will help reorient you to God's nearness and His pursuit of your heart.  Example: "Father, thank You that whether I'm aware of You or not, You are lovingly attentive to my heart and every detail of my life."  (Examples of more quick prayers to refocus your heart on His nearness can be found in my new (FREE!) e-book, Stillness Manifesto: A Call to NON-Action  (Complete with NON-Instructions).

5. Take note of His tangible nearness, and thank Him.  Pause periodically throughout your day.  30 seconds here, 2 minutes there.  In that brief window of time, ask the Lord to remind you of a moment or two thus far in your day during which His presence and/or voice was real and tangible to you.  Thank Him for making you aware of Him in those moments.  Repent for the moments in which you weren't tuned in to His nearness and ask Him to increase your awareness of Him.  We have not because we ask not, right? (James 4:2)

6. Your work can be worship.  Consider your daily tasks, whether you're parenting, cleaning, cooking, working a job, caring for an ill parent.  Whatever your season, whatever the Lord has put before you to do, turn your heart toward Him frequently in the midst of it.  Ask Him to remind you that He's there, to grab your attention periodically.  Remind yourself that when you do your work with excellence, as unto the Lord, He receives it as worship.  And He is right there, closer than your next breath, empowering you and offering grace for every. single. thing. He asks of you.  He invites you to step by faith into doing all of it in His strength and not your own.  And then, by faith, hear His "WELL DONE" as He whispers it to your heart in those moments.  Your lifestyle of worship delights His heart SO. MUCH.

7. Respond to Him in the hard stuff.  During your day, when a particular moment or circumstance is stressful or frustrating or makes you downright mad, pause.  As difficult as it may be to wrangle your emotions in that moment, turn your heart toward the Lord and briefly ask Him to show you how you can respond to Him in the midst of THIS moment, of THIS circumstance.  "God, what is your invitation to me right now?  How can I respond to you in this?"  He will be faithful to show you.  Responding well to His invitations in the midst of the difficult moments will dramatically change the way you experience those moments.  Situations that would otherwise have made you want to pull your hair out will become opportunities to experience His grace and peace and empowerment in a new way.

8. Practice stillness before the Lord regularly, as a spiritual discipline.  Make this a regular piece of your time with the Lord, in addition to prayer, worship, scripture, etc.  It will probably start out feeling like just that - a discipline.  But as you cultivate stillness as a regular piece of your life in God, resting with Him in this way will begin to be something that you look forward to.  God will use these times with Him to bring so, so much LIFE to your heart.  Experiencing God in times of stillness has revolutionized my walk with Him.  I've learned to focus on and know, in my gut, His nearness to me in those moments of stillness.  As I've learned to be aware of Him in those moments, that awareness has begun to carry over into the rest of my days.  I'm learning to be still and in tune with His whispers on the inside when I must be busy on the outside.  Stillness before Him becomes a heart atmosphere that, the more we practice it externally, the more we can carry it with us inside.  And stillness can be practiced in as few as 5-10 minutes a day.  

For 30 pages of info on learning to cultivate stillness as a piece of your life in God, I invite you to download my free e-book, Stillness Manifesto: A Call to NON-Action (Complete with Step-by-Step NON-Instructions). Just click the link and enter your email address to subscribe to receive my monthly e-newsletter.  When you confirm your subscription, you'll receive the private link to download the e-book.  

You can, of course, unsubscribe from my list at any time (though I do hope you'll stick around!), but the e-book will be yours forever and ever. :)

Blessings to you all, friends!  To those of you who are new subscribers in the last few days, WELCOME!!  I am so genuinely happy to have you all here.  May you continue to find blessing and encouragement for your heart here.  

And may you experience God's clear, tender leadership of your heart as you learn to tune in to His nearness more and more, day by day.

You are so loved by your Father.  So, SO dearly loved.

***Are there other ways you've discovered that help you to stay aware of God's nearness to you in the midst of your day-to-day life?  Please comment and share with us!***

~~~~

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To The Perfectionist Inside Of Me (and All Of Us)

Look upward before you look inward.  And look upward MORE than you look inward.

I recently wrote this post about excellence and perfectionism - the dramatic differences between the two, but how they can look so similar.

Since I wrote it, the Lord seems to have ramped up this process of revealing to me more of the areas of my heart where I still wear that "perfectionism shoe."  It's been kind of a difficult week or so.

I've caught myself gazing inward more often than upward.  Double and triple examining my own heart and motives more than drawing near to His heart.  Living in fear over the propensity of my own heart toward sin.  Unwittingly entertaining accusations from the enemy that come disguised as my own thoughts... that I'm not good enough... as a wife, a mom, a leader, a friend... as a lover of Jesus.  

I might've even been a little depressed, subtly.  I, and possibly Stan, are the only ones who would've known.

But then a couple days ago, I was standing in the bathroom, and mid-makeup-application, the Lord suddenly ripped a veil off of my eyes, and out of nowhere, I saw all of this self-criticism for what it was: agreement with the voice of the enemy.  Buying into the lie of perfectionism: that it is within my control and ability to be perfect, or at least nearly so, and I'd better get my act together somehow.

Oh, how I've gotta let it all go.

And how often I need to be reminded that I'm not enough... and it's okay.  It's not my job to be.

So... in light of the truth that all of my broken places and inadequacy are simply signposts to point me back toward awareness of my need for Him.....

To the Perfectionist Inside of Me (and all of us, I think):

All your trying, striving, performing, all this cross-examining of your heart... I want you to pick it all up, run into the presence of Jesus, and fall, however ungraceful it may look, at the foot of the cross.  Confess your weakness.  All your gaps.  All your failure.  

Confess the depth of your need for Him.

And hear His voice... let it wash over your heart like healing balm:

You are precious.  You are beloved of My heart.  You are more than enough for me if you never succeed at anything, ever, EVER again.  My love for you and desire for you are completely separate from your performance.  The blood of My Son has spoken identity over you.  This is where your value to ME is found: in His sacrifice to purchase your life... and not in your ability to perform.  Remember, daughter.  Remember how precious you are to My heart.  How the mere turning of your heart and eyes toward Me overwhelms My heart with delight.

Now, leaving all of the heavy, draining self-consciousness at the foot of the cross... stand up... and lean in.

Lean into the One who carries and resources and supplies all your needs.  The One whose strength is made perfect in your weakness.  The One whose beauty is revealed as He fills in your gaps.  The One who is ENOUGH in all of the places where you'll never achieve that status. 

Trust Him to gently lead your heart into more and more purity and peace... this is not something you are asked to accomplish on your own.   

Keep your eyes on Him and all that HE IS instead of all that YOU'RE NOT.  Worship.  Fix your gaze on His beauty, your heart on His faithfulness. 

His leadership is perfect and trustworthy... and if your heart is after Him and your eyes are turned toward Him, He will gently reveal areas in your life, in His perfect timing, where He wants to bring change.  (See this post on differentiating between conviction - from the Holy Spirit - and condemnation - from the enemy.)

It is not your job to continually dig around in your own heart and discover these places on your own.  It is your job to surrender to His work within your heart when He reveals these things.

Introspection apart from His grace-filled conviction and leadership is destructive.  But as you focus on all that He is, He will convict and reveal and transform and draw you more and more into surrender to His Lordship. 

He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it.  It's His job. 

 Allow Him to have His way in Your heart... and rest in the knowledge that He is committed to the process!  He is committed to partnering with you, to holding your hand as you continually walk toward holiness in the deep places.  Don't fear the dark corners.  He knows them intimately and holds you with grace.  Again, He's committed to the process... you can trust His perfect leadership.  And His heart bursts with affection for you NOW, dark corners and all.   

This is not sloppy grace.  His invitation is to wholeheartedly abandoning yourself to this journey of becoming more like Him ~~ doing it out of a place of trusting His leadership and resting in His commitment to you; not out of a place of fear over what's really in those deep places of your heart and whether you're "enough" or not.

You are His beloved.  Look upward before looking inward.  And look upward MORE than you look inward.  You can trust His process inside of you.

Core Motives: Excellence or Perfectionism?

Image Credit: thedailymuse.com

As moms, "doing" seems to be our full time job, doesn't it?  We cook for our families, feed our little ones, clean up messes, run errands, do laundry, clean up MORE messes, teach our children, discipline, clean up still MORE messes, mediate an argument, give baths, discipline some more, instruct little hearts, clean up again, read bedtime stories, pray for our kids, tuck them in.  And then we clean up again.  Go to sleep.  Wake up.  Repeat.

A year or so ago, a dear friend called me one day and spoke something into my heart that has changed my heart and perspective in all of these tasks that are continually before me.

The illustration was this: Me, wearing 2 different shoes.  One was labeled "perfectionism," and the other, "excellence."  He said he felt that the Lord wanted to remove my "perfectionism" shoe and replace it with another "excellence" shoe.

My friend shared with me these essential truths:  that perfectionism is motivated by fear... whereas excellence is motivated by love.

Isn't it interesting how similar these 2 shoes can look at first glance? But from God's perspective, they are as different as night and day.  

Perfectionism is our attempt to earn favor: other people's, or God's.  Excellence is operating out of a sureness that we already HAVE God's favor...and that's all that matters.  

And the RIGHT-NOW-ness of this truth FOR ME crashed in on my heart in that moment.  I knew the Lord and I were about to embark on a journey.

Ever since my friend's phone call that day, God and I have been in process together, Him often revealing to me areas of my heart where I've been operating ("doing") out of perfectionism instead of excellence.

What I Know Now...

In all of our "doing," what matters to the Father so much more than all our accomplishments... is the condition of our hearts before Him in the midst of our doing.  Are we motivated by love?  Or by fear?

Here are some symptoms that clue me in to places in my heart where my motive in doing has been perfectionism/performance/striving:

• I'm motivated by a subtle (or not so subtle?) fear.  Fear of failure, of not meeting people's expectations, of disappointing myself...fear of disappointing God.  Fear of people's opinions of all my running around and doing.
• I compare myself to other moms, rating myself as either inferior or superior in my performance.
• Feverishly working to achieve goals; being afraid to slow down and rest.
• OR... Being almost paralyzed by fear of failure, so much so that I almost can't get up and get ANYthing done.
• Possibly swinging back and forth between the 2 previous extremes... maybe even several times per day.
• I'm easily stressed out if I don't accomplish all that I had set out to do on a particular day... I don't trust God with what I'm unable to get done and let it go.
• After finishing a project or a conversation, I hash and re-hash what I could have or should have done or said differently... I have a hard time leaving the results to the Lord.
• I sometimes frantically grasp for control of my environment... Everything must be perfectly in order.  If it's not, it speaks negatively of me.

These are the warning signs.

And when the Father highlights one of these symptoms in my heart, instead of seeing it and allowing my thinking to move toward condemning myself for my failure, God asks me to see it as a gentle invitation from Him to once again allow Him to remove my "perfectionism shoe" and allow excellence to become my core motivation in yet another arena of my heart.

"Child," He says, "I long for your obedience and all of your "doing" to flow out of a confidence and a rest in Your heart, a deep knowledge that your status of 'beloved one' is not dependent upon what you do... or don't do."

And I want to live before Him as a daughter, confident in her Father's affections... so much so that the opinions of anyone else (including myself!) pale in comparison... don't you?

Here are some signs that I'm operating out of Love-empowered excellence:

• I'm relaxed as I go about completing the tasks before me.  I'm not stressed if I'm unable to accomplish everything on my to-do list for a particular day.
• I am secure.  I don't need to perform perfectly in order to prove my worth.  My value has already been determined by Jesus' sacrifice for me...His blood that "speaks a better word" over me. To the Father, I am worth the blood of His Son...and nothing I can do (or fail at doing) can increase or decrease my value to Him.
• My identity is in the Father, His heart toward me, and who He says I am....and NOT in how clean my house is, how obedient my son is, or how much I can "git 'er done."
• I can give genuine effort to a project or conversation (or blog post!) out of a place of resting in the Lord, do my best while abiding in Him, trust Him with the results, and then let it go.
• I am motivated and encouraged and empowered by my Father's "well done!" as He whispers it to my heart throughout my days... as opposed to being motivated by the desire to earn God's favor, or to impress people... or the fear of how their opinions of me might change if I fail to perform.

God... more and more, let me be found with 2 "excellence" shoes on my feet.  Would you let perfectionism and all my striving to perform in my own strength fall off of me as I am more and more deeply rooted and grounded in Your love...Your perfect love that casts out fear?  I choose right now to rest in Your commitment to completing this work that you've begun in my heart.  You will finish what You've started.  Come and have Your way in me, Father.  I trust You....

Be blessed today, friends... and could I encourage you to courageously allow Him to examine your heart today, to begin to remove your "perfectionism shoe" and replace it with excellence that flows out of your identity in Him?  He is so committed to the fully-alive-ness (if that's a word) of your heart...

...And you are so loved,

PS - Linking up over here this morning, at SarahMae.com. Join me if you have a sec?

One Step At a Time... LEANING

The other day, I was in a "funk" for most of the day.  Know the feeling?

Here's my [officially unofficial] definition - - 

FUNK (n):  The vague feeling that something's "off" in one's heart... very rarely connected to a specific event or cause... and almost always resulting in irritability and general bummed-out-ness.

Yup.... I definitely was in that place most of that day...  and it took me till evening to finally sit down with the Lord and figure out the root cause: that I was overwhelmed by everything that I'm NOT and all that I need/want to get done in the next week and all of the places where I feel inadequate.  

Bottom line: I'd had my eyes on my own weakness and weariness and inadequacy and all of the limitations on what I can accomplish within the realm of my own strength... instead of fixing my gaze on God's more-than-adequacy and the fact that I can do all things because HE is my strength. (Phil. 4:13)

And why is it sometimes so much easier to just STAY in that "funky" place than it is to get intentionally before the Lord and let Him sort out all of this ridiculousness in my heart?  Why did it take me all day to finally sit down and ask Him for insight into what was wrong?

Sometimes I think I'm just more comfortable being... uncomfortable... when God is sitting, waiting, holding out this perfect peace and rest to me, if I'm just willing to take hold of it. 

Anyway... so that night I finally sat with the Lord for a few minutes and realized I needed to re-read some things that He's spoken to my heart in the past.  

So I RE-reminded myself (or rather, stilled my heart so HE could RE-remind me) that:

•  in my weakness, His strength is more than enough, and He fills in my gaps.  
• in moments like these when my to-do list is overwhelming, I need to take a deep breath and allow Him to expand my heart to hold more of what He's wanting to accomplish inside of me.
• He is the Source of everything I need to do all that He's putting before me in this season.
• and that He rejoices in the fact that I have such a long way to go yet, because it's in the journey that He waits to encounter me intimately.

Image Credit: onyourwallsojerusalem.blogspot.com

And these truths of who He is, and how He pursues my heart ESPECIALLY when I'm so keenly aware of everything I'm not, and how He glorifies Himself when I lean into Him in my weakness... They're enough for me today.

HE is enough for me today...in all of the places where I'm so far from enough.

Bye-bye, funky funk!  Hello again, Peace and Joy and Rest!

Father, help me to rest in Your more-than-enough-ness today.  You are my completeness and everything I need for this moment... and the next... and the next... I find it all in You.  Let my roots grow down deeper today into You, my Everything.

Friends, today, may we take one step at a time... LEANING... and may we encounter Your heart deeply in the process... and see Your beauty displayed as You fill in our gaps.

Blessings to you today, dear ones... You are so precious to your Father.

How To Live a First-Hand Kind of Life (Pointing You Toward Some (IN)Couragement Today!)

Good Monday morning, dear friends!

Today I want to share with you an article that really blew me away the other day with its insight and TRUTH.  It's Sarah Mae's Post: How To Live a First-Hand Kind of Life and it appeared the other day at (In)Courage, which is a pretty big site for women that's run by Dayspring.

(Incidentally, they are publishing an article I wrote in their "Guests" section later this week!  So excited about that!)

So... the article at (In)Courage by Sarah Mae (check her blog out if you have a minute... she's really great.  Lots of depth and honesty there.) reminded me of this quote by Marrianne Williamson.  There are a few things about this that I don't quite agree with the way she worded... but the point is that God created us to be FULLY, WILDLY ALIVE... like I wrote about the other day a little bit.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

Anyway, check out Sarah Mae's Post today if you will.  And let God challenge you and draw you and strengthen you to be freely YOURSELF... the way He created you to be.

Be blessed today to encounter Him deeply as you do the things He puts before you today.  May we live our lives radically today, as extravagant worship before our extravagant God.

Monday Morning Meditation (A Reset Button For Your Day)

Image Credit: entrequest.com

Good Monday Morning, Friends!

I don't know about you, but my Monday mornings often entail a sweet kiddo who's sad and frustrated because his daddy had to go back to work after being available for hugs and play all weekend, a big ol' pile of laundry demanding my attention, and a big ol' pile of to-do lists rolling around in my brain.  Today is no exception...and it actually may be more extreme than normal in the "laundry piles" and "to-do" categories.

Sometimes on mornings like these I struggle.  I struggle to live and move out of a place of rest and peace.  I struggle to demonstrate grace and joy to my family.  Pressure can easily translate to STRESS for me on days like this.  Know the feeling?

And yet, today, with 2 to-do lists written out and a load of laundry already rockin' and rollin' down in our dungeon basement/laundry room (old house = scary basement = usually no laundry hookups on main floor.), I find myself with a surprising amount of peace and an even greater amount of joy and anticipation for today.... and I just wanted to take a minute to quickly share with you my Source of peace and joy and LIFE for today...in hopes that you'll be encouraged and strengthened and empowered for today as well!

His divine power has [already] given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and goodness.  2 Peter 1:3

It's ours.  He's already put within us, through our knowledge of His Son, everything we need for life AND GODLINESS in the midst of life.

Inner peace.  Righteousness.  Joy.  Love.  Grace for those around us.  In whatever circumstances in which we find ourselves.  ALL WE NEED is ours.

Our responsibility is to choose, by faith, to step into those things... in HIS strength.  We step out and obey in faith... He meets us and empowers our obedience.  Beautiful.

Take a deep breath right now. If your day's already off to a rough start (Believe me, I know how that goes!!), hit the "reset" button in your heart right now by allowing this truth to sink in for a few minutes.

Your Father is right there waiting to meet you.

Grace to you all today, my friends.  May you experience His empowering of your faith-filled obedience today...and may your hearts be tuned in to hear His "well done, precious child!" in the midst of it.  May all that you do today flow out of a place of rest and trust in His heart toward you, His commitment to Your life.

You are so loved....

Such A Long Way To Go (Celebrate the Journey)

Hello Friends,

I've been sitting here pouring out my heart to the Lord and I just need to write my heart today....real and raw and honest....in the form of a letter to God.


Father,

I feel like I have such a long way to go.  As a wife, a mom, a leader, and just as a human being on this journey with You.

I want to be so much more than I am in so many areas... and there are so many places in my heart where I  long to see rapid growth and yet Your processes inside of me seem.....so..... painfully.....slooowwww.

I want to be MORE focused and fully alive and present to those You've put before me daily: namely, my husband and my son, and those with whom we pursue community.

I want my heart to be continually in a place where I'm still inside and at peace and tuned in to Your nearness and Your whispers to me.

I want to derive my identity totally from You, from Your heart toward me, and not be influenced or swayed or defined by the opinions of people.

I want the priorities of my heart and time and energy and focus to be in order and pleasing to You.

I feel so far from where I want to be.... in more ways than I can count.

Oh Father, sometimes I look at my own inadequacy and it makes me shudder and tremble on the inside.  

Sometimes I look at myself and all I can see are my weak spots and the places I want to be that I am just....simply....not.


And then these precious whispers from Him come cascading down over my heart...


My Sweet Daughter,

It's very true that you have a long way to go....and I am thrilled by that... because the journey, the process, is what this whole relationship thing is all about.

I want you to walk here, right beside Me as I mold and shape and steer you toward all that I have for you and all I want you to become.  And if you were to quickly arrive at all of these places where you want to be, think how much you and I would miss out on together along the way.... 

Intimacy is forged along the way...as you take your eyes off of your own inadequacy and fix them on My MORE-THAN-ADEQUACY.

I'm inviting you to celebrate the journey.  Celebrate the long way ahead.  When you're tempted to be frustrated because the path is so long....relax, lean into Me as we walk together.

In this space in time where you see the goal ahead and are tempted to so quickly rush to compare the now version of yourself to who you know you will be then...see each of those gaps between the now and the not yet as opportunities... 


...opportunities to be filled by Me, empowered by Me, to be a vessel in which My strength can be made perfect and through which My glory can pour out all around you.

And remember this truth... if you could meet people's every need, you would draw them into dependence on you instead of pointing them toward ME as their ultimate Source.

So... let's walk this road together today...and the next day....and the next.  And let Me hold your hand and guide you and be the Strength and the Beauty that fill your weak places.  Let Me fill in your gaps.

And as you learn to lean into Me still more, the depth of trust and relationship we will share will be beyond your wildest dreams.  I can't wait to share more of My heart with you as we walk this path....

I love that we have a long way to go....together.

*********

As always, I love to hear your heart, friends.  If you're here today, I'd love for your to let me in on your thoughts a little, to let me know how I can pray for you.... to let me walk with you for a few minutes here...?  

Be blessed today to experience His completeness, strength, and beauty in all your weak places as you lean into Him more...


(Related:  For the Days We Feel So Inadequate,  Gentle Reminders to Slow Down)

(Oh God, HELP Me...)...Roll With It! (A.K.A. Surf's Up; Ride It Out)

I am in desperate need of a nap. At least, I think I am.  I have a cold and didn't get enough sleep last night.  My son has a cold too, and I just KNOW he's going to take a 2 - 3 hour nap today.  I spend the first hour of his nap time getting caught up on a bit of writing and some reading, and literally the SECOND that I go to put the computer down, lay down, and doze off into bliss (well, as much bliss as can be achieved when you're trying to sleep with a stopped up nose)....

"Out!  Out!  I get up!"  My son's (startling, albeit adorable) voice rings out through the monitor, jarring me out of my sleepy thoughts.

"You have GOT to be kidding me."  <<groan>>

One thing that you have no control over as a parent of an almost-2-year-old is when your normally very scheduled toddler is going to decide to completely leave the beaten schedule-path and suddenly shorten his one and only nap to just shy of an hour.  Hopefully it doesn't become a trend.

Another thing you have no control over is when things randomly decide to DIVE off your refrigerator shelves at you when you open the door.  (Hey, c'mon, cut me some slack - - I'm trying to convince myself (and you) that I really had no control over it, and that it had nothing to do with the fact that I haven't cleaned the fridge out recently enough.  Is it working?  No?  Sigh....  At least I tried.)

Oh, how I WISH I'd had the wherewithal to grab my phone and snap a picture of the explosion... but when you're trying to figure out which of the red spots all over your legs are blood from glass shrapnel, and which are flecks of salsa, taking a picture isn't exactly your highest priority.  (Thankfully, none of it was blood, though there were several very small pieces of glass lodged - not deeply - in my skin and clothes.)  Just imagine a brand new jar of Pace completely smashed on the floor in front of my fridge, and IN my fridge, and salsa flung all over the kitchen walls and cupboards.  Got the mental picture?  (Insert another <<groan>> here.)

This was one of those moments when I'm super thankful my husband works (for 3 more weeks, anyway, until he starts his new job) from home.  My Stan-in-shining-armor came to my rescue and got started cleaning up the mess while I ran upstairs to try to get out of my clothes without getting cut on any glass that was stuck in them.  Success.  I come back downstairs, finish mopping, and re-mopping, the kitchen floor.  No more glass shards to be found.

So now I'm in the process of mopping the kitchen floor for a third time because now my flip flops are sticking to the floor when I walk...when I hear a cry of shock from the playroom (where Isaac had thankfully been during the entire exploding-glass/salsa ordeal.)

Trying not to slip on the wet floor, I quickly made my way the 7 or so steps into the playroom to find.... (wait for it....)



(This is a little embarrassing... I'm going to admit to one of those moments that really makes you feel like a bad mom....)



(Still working up the nerve............)



Whew.  Okay.  Here goes:

I walk into the playroom to find.... my almost-2-year-old son with the blind cord wrapped tightly around his neck!!  Augh!!  He was crying, terrified.... Which at least reassured me that he wasn't choking.  I gasped (unfortunately, as I usually try hard to carefully measure my responses when Isaac is hurt so as to help him feel MORE secure and confident - - not LESS so.  Epic fail.  Ah well....)....quickly freed him and held him tightly till he calmed down....thanking Jesus that he was safe and trying not to feel terrible about my parenting skills.

The Offending Blind Cord

[This is the part where I have to make the disclaimer that we DO keep our blind cords wrapped, up high, on those little blind-cord-holder-things.  Yes, that is the technical terminology.  Apparently Isaac has grown tall enough now that when standing on the futon in our playroom, he can reach up and grab the cord.  Yikes.  Gonna have to move that blind-cord-holder-thing up higher.]

Anyway.... I don't have a WHOLE lot of super deep stuff to say today... just this.  With every one of these circumstances, the challenge of the Lord to me today was...

"Girl, roll with it!  Take a deep breath (through your mouth since your nose is stuffed), trust ME to be your Source, and roll with it."

When life feels as ridiculously MESSY (literally AND figuratively!) as mine did this afternoon, it's super easy to get into "everyone-outa-my-way-I'm-a-stressed-out-mama" mode.  (A.K.A. "When Mama ain't happy, ain't NOBODY happy!")

We've all been guilty of hurting our family's hearts because in our own hearts we've moved OUT of a place of abiding in our Father and being resourced by Him alone, and INTO a place of trying to do things in our own strength.

Responding to God's invitations to us in stressful, messy moments like these, involves: 

• breathing deep
• riding out the waves as they come... 
• while coming to grips with our inability to control them...
• doing our best out of a place of rest* in our Father...
• ...and just ROLLING with it.  

In other words.... Surf's Up...Ride It Out.

*I'm such a poet.... "Do your best...out of rest...."

And roll with it.

Annnnnd, that's a wrap.  (Or a rap?  Hmmm... I see another album on the horizon..... just kidding!!!  I promise.)

(Wow, wonder if my cold medicine is making me loopy tonight...?)

PS - It's time for me to take my cold to bed... so I just stopped by the kitchen sink on the way upstairs, and for some reason happened to glance at the ceiling...and.... SALSA!  Aaauugh!  But at least I got a picture for you....  Here ya go:

See it??  (Pardon the weird lighting.)

What about you?  
What are some truths or characteristics of God that
help enable you to "roll with it?"  
Any crazy circumstances in your life lately that have made
riding life's waves a little more difficult than normal?

How to Furnish and Decorate Your Kid's Room on a Budget (and Have Fun Doing It!) : Part 4

Hi!  Welcome back, friends!  So glad you've stopped by today for the 4th and final post of my series, "How to Furnish and Decorate Your Kid's Room On A Budget (and Have Fun Doing It!)"  If you missed parts 1 - 3 of the series, you can check them out here:

How to Furnish and Decorate Your Kid's Room On A Budget: Part 1
How to Furnish and Decorate Your Kid's Room on a Budget Part 2
How to Furnish and Decorate Your Kid's Room on a Budget: Part 3

So.... I've shared with you my journey through discovering free furniture possibilities, the wonders of Craig's List, garage sales, spray paint and scrapbook paper, and hopefully you've been inspired to try some new, fun acrylic painting projects for your kids' rooms.  For me, all of this has been so, so fun!  Never dreamed I could be SO INTO home decorating...and I never dreamed I could do SO MUCH for SO LITTLE!  By budgeting for these things over a couple of months, it really wasn't any strain on our budget at all.....and my son has a completely furnished and decorated room.  You too can pull this off! :)

One last project that I thought I'd show you:

Mistake #1:  I totally jumped into making this on my own (yikes!), with no instructions, not even one glance at Pinterest.  Oops! :)  Oh well.... It turned out pretty well nonetheless....but there are a few things I'd do differently next time.  Here's how I put this together, and what I'll do differently if I make another one:

Materials List:

Cheap Bulletin Board (Hello, Walmart!)

Fabric

Batting

Ribbon

Transportation (or whatever other fun theme) Buttons... like these:

Regular Buttons

Staples and Stapler

Craft Glue

Needle and Thread

Picture Hanging Materials (of your choice)

Step 1: Lay batting out over board, pulling slightly over the edges. (If I had it to do again, I'd only use one layer.  I used 2 this time, and it's okay, but a little too pillowy (if that's a word...?) for me now that it's finished.)

Step 2: Cover batting with fabric, wrapping smoothly and tightly around edges and corners.  

Step 3: While holding firmly, staple your fabric in several places per side, all the way around the back of the board.

Step 4: Use craft glue around the back of the board to make sure the fabric stays attached! 

Step 5: Stretch ribbon across board at desired widths, and craft glue it to the back of the board on either side.  (If I do this again, I'll measure my widths and angles more carefully so as to achieve straighter, more aesthetically pleasing lines with my ribbon intersections.  Does that make sense?)

Step 6: Sew buttons to each intersection of ribbon, making sure to simultaneously sew the ribbon down to the fabric at each intersection.

Step 7: Attach to the back whatever you're using to hang your board.... I would use Super Glue or something similar to ensure security.

Step 8:  After glue is completely dry, hang, stuff with pics of your kid's favorite people, and talk about the pictures (and theme-related buttons!! :) ) with him/her every day!!  He/she (and YOU!) will love having it in their room!!

Thanks again so much for coming along with me on my low budget room-decorating adventures.  The way we decorate our homes really does give expression to pieces of our hearts.... Thanks for letting me share mine with you!

I'll leave you with a few final pics from Isaac's (newly, inexpensively decorated) room.  :)

The one thing in this room that I still need to spray paint:
The glider.  Another garage sale find, but in great shape.
Definitely covering up those old cushions.... :)  A gorgeous
afghan from my mom (a.k.a. Gigi) helps a ton!  The solid blue
afghan on bottom was a gift from a dear friend in Colorado.

The Craig's List dresser from How to Furnish and Decorate

Your Kid's Room on a Budget: Part 1!  It occurred to me that

I never actually posted a picture of it!  Sorry about that!

Pretty sure those red picture frames will eventually be on a wall.

These shelves and brackets are easy to find at almost any home improvement
store.  They are inexpensive and relatively easy to hang, too!  Just make sure
you have your stud finder handy...

Thanks again, friends, for letting me share my ideas with you.... I would love to hear about (and see!) your own decorating adventures....  Share with me in the comments?  Thanks so much!

Be blessed this weekend to encounter Jesus in the big and small gifts in your life....

~Dana <3

How To Furnish and Decorate Your Kid's Room On A Budget (And Have Fun Doing It!) Part 3

Welcome, friends!  Here we are again!  Thanks for checking out part 3 of my series, How to Furnish and Decorate Your Kid's Room on a Budget (and Have Fun Doing It!).  (Again I must say, pardon my long-winded title! :) )

**If you missed the first 2 parts of the series, here ya go:
How To Furnish and Decorate Your Kid's Room On A Budget: Part 1
and....
How To Furnish and Decorate Your Kid's Room On A Budget: Part 2

Annnnnnnd.... here we go!  Prepare for more easy, low-budget tweaks that bring personality and pizzazz to your kiddo's room.

Remember the old brown mirror with bronze hooks? I had spray painted it white, and the hooks gray.  Well..... I took it a step further.  I LOVE painting.... just acrylics, and I'm really not all that good at it, but I don't have to be.  I can look at pictures (in this case, the airplanes and blimps on Isaac's bedding) and replicate them to end up with some fairly cool-looking 2D stuff.  Here's how the mirror ended up:

I have it hanging over his dresser for now.... but when he's a year or so older,
I'll hang it down closer to his level so he can hang his jackets, etc. on the hooks.

Not perfect by any means, but still a really fun (and inexpensive - nearly free!) custom piece for Isaac's room.  It's not hard - you should give it a try!  Garage saleing this weekend, anyone?! Yay for low-budget treasures!  (If you do go garage saling, remember to look at things with eyes to see what they COULD be with a few tweaks, and don't discount them because they're not pretty....yet!)

Along these lines, let me share the 3rd amazing (and yes, budget friendly) discovery I've made as I've put his room together:  Hobby Lobby sells these awesome wooden frames, in various sizes, that can be crafted and painted.  They also sell little wooden letters like this that can be painted and glued to whatever project you're creating.....and wooden plaques like these.   (Walmart has some stuff like this too, but Hobby Lobby has a much better selection.)  I have LOVED using this stuff to decorate his room - it's been SO MUCH FUN!!  This is the reason why this is my favorite post so far in this series. :)  Pretty much everything I've painted/crafted for Isaac's room is 2 dimensional and relatively easy to pull off....even if you've never painted before.  Here's how I do it:

1. Do a Google Image search like this.  Find something that you like, preferably something 2D.  (2D is just way easier, to start out with anyway...)  Practice drawing your picture in pencil on a piece of scrap paper until you like how it turns out.

2. Paint your wooden plaque, frame, or whatever you're using with whatever color acrylic paint that you want to use as your background color.

3. After the background color has dried, with the image in front of you, draw the image over your painted background lightly in pencil.

4. Use small brushes to paint whatever colors you want.  Rule of thumb: Simple is good.

5. Finally, go back and outline, in black paint, where your pencil markings used to be.  Maybe this is because I'm a total amateur, but I've found that the easiest way to get clean, thin lines like you need, is by using toothpicks.  I dip my toothpick in black paint, paint about 1-2 inches worth of outline, re-dip, and continue.  I usually have to use 3-4 toothpicks because the ends start to get soggy.... but hey, it works!  A little craft glue, some painted wooden letters (maybe some ribbon too?), annnnnd..... there you have it!

This is hanging on his door... He ADORES backhoes.  Obsessively. :)

Isaac is also obsessed with lawnmowers... in Isaac language:
"Mom-monners."

Zoo photo collage. This is a little busy for me, honestly.  I like the frame,
but as soon as I have a worthy picture, I'm going to remove the collage
and just have 1 photo in this frame against a solid color background.
Still, I really like how this frame turned out. :)

Just throwing this in for fun.  Found cool ribbon at Hobby Lobby
that matches the scrapbook paper in the backs of the bookcases!

Seriously, I am a TOTAL amateur.  I have had no real education when it comes to painting - I've just figured it out on my own a little bit... and have ended up with some totally cute, fun, (if slightly less-than-perfect) custom decor for Isaac's room that he absolutely LOVES. :)  (And I love it too!)  Soooo, I say all of this to say, YOU CAN DO IT TOO!  Try it!  And when you do, come back again, comment, and leave a link to a picture of your final product! I'd love to see it, and it will inspire others to give it a try too!

(I should mention also that acrylic paints, in case you're new to them, are very, very inexpensive.  You can find small bottles anywhere from 50 cents to $2 at Walmart, Hobby Lobby, or any other craft store.)

Thanks so much for sitting down with me for a few minutes today!  Hopefully you're feeling inspired to do some new, fun things in your own children's rooms.  They will love it, no matter how it turns out, just because YOU did it!  I promise! :)  Tune in tomorrow for Part 4 (the final segment) of How to Furnish and Decorate Your Kid's Room On A Budget (and Have Fun Doing It!).

PS - Our creative projects give expression to pieces of our hearts....  I would LOVE to hear your ideas and/or see pics of projects you've completed in your children's rooms!  Share with us, and I will do my best to respond quickly!  Thanks, friends!

How to Furnish and Decorate Your Kid's Room On A Budget (and Have FUNDoing It!): Part 2

Welcome to Part 2 of How to Furnish and Decorate Your Kid's Room On A Budget (and Have Fun Doing It!).  (Please pardon my long-winded title! :)  If you missed part one of the series, check it out here.

And now..... Here's the first amazing discovery I made on this journey of furnishing and decorating Isaac's big-boy room:  SPRAY PAINT.  Surprised?  You can do a lot more with spray paint these days than in the past.... because this is not just any spray paint... I'm talking about RustOleum spray paint.  It is AMAZING.  I used this color blue, which I found at our local Ace Hardware store.  This stuff sticks!  To EVERYTHING.  Wood (sanded, OR NOT!), metal, even PLASTIC!  It has revolutionized my (decorating) life.  It transforms old, blah-looking furniture (and wicker baskets!) into totally cool kid-room decor.....with ZERO SANDING!  Really!  I was shocked!  Just dust your furniture first, spray on one fairly thin coat at a time (outside, of course), allow about 20 min. of dry time between coats, and at least an hour and a half or so before handling... and.... TA-DA!  I did about 3 coats total on each bookcase. Talk about low-budget transformation!  Each can is about 4 bucks, and I used about 1 & 1/2 to 2 cans per bookcase.

(I like that the amount of shelf space
gives us room to grow in terms of
toys, books, etc.) 

I also spray painted a couple of wicker baskets (also from my friends' garage sale) to create really cool accents for the room...and a few picture frames too!  (I'm not sure I'll leave the frames on the dresser... I may hang them on the wall at some point.)  It was so. incredibly. EASY!

Another Spray Painted Treasure....

Remember the old brown mirror with bronze hooks?  I removed the hooks with a screwdriver and spray painted them gray. Then I covered the glass with paper and painter's tape, and spray painted the wood frame white. Allowed it to dry for an hour or so, screwed the hooks back on, and had a really cute mirror with gray hooks.  Super easy!  But I wasn't finished with it yet....  Tune in to part 3 to see how the mirror turned out.  It's pretty sweet!

But first......



Time to share amazing discovery number 2: Scrapbook paper!  The backs of the book cases were a little beat up, so I decided to cover them with scrapbook paper.  I found the perfect scrapbook paper at Hobby Lobby" trucks, trains, rockets, airplanes... Isaac loves to look at it and talk about them. :) It looks really cool, adds to the theme of the room, and Isaac hasn't yet discovered that there are edges that could possibly be peeled.  It helps that our housemate Jerusha and I spread a thin layer of craft glue around the edges of each page, as close to the edge as possible.  The paper is glued down pretty well.  I think between both bookcases we used about 22 sheets.  Super fun, easy, and, you guessed it, a low-budget spruce-up for some inexpensive, but now pretty awesome, book cases.

**IMPORTANT SIDE NOTE**
If you put book cases, or even a dresser, in a child's room, they should ALWAYS be attached to the wall (into a stud) so it doesn't end up being pulled down on top of your child.  Just had to put that out there.

Come back tomorrow for Part 3 of "How To Furnish and Decorate Your Kid's Room On A Budget (and Have Fun Doing It!)"  

Secret:  Part 3 is my favorite part of this series....and includes "Amazing Discovery Number 3!" :)